Searching for Soul

 I found myself having to attend funeral services twice in the midst of this pandemic. The first one was for my  aunt who was like a second mother to me, and the second was for the actual mother of one of my best friends. Both of these ladies were alike in lots of ways. They both were devoted Catholics (in words and deed) and the center of their respective worlds were their families. Unfortunately they also both succumbed to health complications from COVID 19 within months of each other.  My aunt died during the earlier days of the quarantine so no church mass was allowed. The only service was a brief gathering of only 15 of us in the funeral home. Reflecting on the amount of time and money that my aunt and uncle (who both attended services regularly) spent in support of their parish church, it made me slightly angry that she wasn't afforded the full ceremony that we all knew she more than deserved. I know her children wanted to provide that for her and were quite upset t...

  Surrender is one of those words that seems to have a visceral feel to it. It invokes emotions in people that may vary but usually hover around the feeling of despair. When we use surrender in the terms of a battle, we are affirming the fact that one side is giving up or has their hands held up in defeat. It signifies failure and loss which then engenders the feelings of shame and guilt.  Before my spiritual awakening (and to be truthful even at times after it), I did not like the word at all. Surrender meant to me being weak and out of control. So you can imagine my confusion when all of my spiritual teachers started pushing me toward accepting surrender as not only a worthwhile process but one that is essential if one is to grow as a spiritual person.  I have been single for most of my adult life and spent most of it living alone. From the time I moved out at age 22 (which my mother used to refer to as the time I ran away from home), until now 30 years later I have bee...

One of the aspects of spirituality that has led me to more enlightenment is the appearance and recognition of signs and synchronicities in my life. I have always believed that lost loved ones and the Divine find ways to communicate with us. In the past I thought that you had to consult a medium to be sure of the messages. I looked to priests to help explain why good things happen to bad people. But last summer I discovered that anyone and everyone can and does receive these messages directly from the Universe. And the way I discovered this was through reading a book I classify as one of my God-led media choices. Let me explain.  I have found that at some of the lowest points of my life I have received comfort out of the blue through a song, album, book, or movie. When my beloved cousin died suddenly at age 27, I was a 22 year old who was completely lost and devastated. My whole family loved music, and I turned to it to help me heal. I had just purchased Van Morrison's album, Enligh...

Our spiritual beliefs are personal and often taboo to be spoken about in "polite" company. So why would I choose to write about them? Well, I have several reasons for choosing this theme for my blog.  1. Spiritualism is something that has helped me through some rough times. Even today I have had to lean on my beliefs in order to get through some tough energy. Just this week alone I've experienced more than my share of pain. One of my dearest friends lost her mother to COVID. I had to call an ambulance for my sister to return her to the hospital for complications related to a brain tumor. My uncle has been fighting off side-effects from treatment for cancer. One man I cared for lied to me, then I mistakenly sent a text to another one I've been trying to forget about. (For an extra twist of the knife in my back, he didn't even recognize my number and had to ask who I was. Nothing like emphasizing how little I meant to him.) In the past all of these events would hav...

People have a visceral reaction whenever they hear I use tarot cards to give people spiritual readings. They either are fascinated by the process or they are repelled by the thought that I am "playing with fire". There really doesn't seem to be a middle ground. While I understand the emotions surrounding the use of tarot, I try not to let it steer me away from using it as a tool. If a client seems scared of the tarot cards, I do refrain from using them. However, I wanted to explain my view of the cards. Now, this may not match up with the "actual" history of the tarot, but I don't feel the need to because of the way I use them (more on that later).  Here are my Tarot Truths: 1. The tarot tells a story. It is about the Fool's journey through spiritual ascension. There are two types of cards, Major and Minor Arcana. The Major Arcana shows the different phases/reactions of the Fool as he/she progresses. The Fool is innocent (in my eyes), excited, and somet...

Have you ever been led to do something that was completely off of your radar before? When I say I was led to start this blog, I mean that I had completely gone off the idea of blogging although I've started a few in the past. The last thing I wanted to do was put myself out there again. Nothing bad happened with my last blogs, but the experience of writing stopped giving me the same satisfaction as before. I was okay not writing for the public because I still kept my personal journal which got me through some recent rough times. I'm also working on a few writing projects which I hope one day will be released for the public as well. So my itch to write which has been with me my entire life was well-scratched. But yesterday I felt a familiar nudge that inspired me to write for public consumption again. So, here I am. Searching for Soul is a reflection of my life as a spiritualist who is trying to find ways to use my gifts to help others. Although I was raised a Roman Catholic, I ...